TTC - With a Dash of Anxiety

Wed Jan 23, 2013 4:59 pm

I know I'm ready for another baby. I'm excited about having another baby. DH and I both want another baby.

However, I start to feel anxious and nervous as soon as we stop preventing and really start ttc. Before hand, when it's all talk, I am crazy excited and totally on board, then it's like holy smokes, this could happen...again. Am I really ready? Am I doing the right thing? Some days my kids resemble those creatures out of the book Where the Wild Things Are...oh boy, another Wild Thing. Can I do this? OMG, what if I have twins!

Anyways, you get the picture. Once the rubber meets the road and I know there is no going back I start to get a little sweaty palmed.

Does anyone else go through this (even if it's your first)?

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com

Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:22 pm

Oh my, YES, Em!! This time especially. The first two times I didn't have this anxiety b/c I wanted it so badly and wanted Addie to have a special sibling to share things with (and right now they are both playing so nicely in Pey's room together and I hear them giggling and love it), but when I got that BFP last month I actually freaked out (didn't tell anyone tho since everything else happened so fast). Especially with Addie starting kindergarten this coming fall I am super scared of what having another lo will mean with her involved with school activities (and she's already doing dancing with church and tball spring and fall). But I know things will fall into place and we will all adjust, have rough times and good times, and I still know it will be worth it in the end.

Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:28 pm

Absolutely!

I've never been pregnant - didn't get married until I was 36, so I wonder if I will be so selfish (no Saturday morning sleeping in - WHAT?!) and scared of the changes to my body (I just lost 80lbs 2 years ago - do NOT want to gain it back!) and how it will affect my relationship with DH.

Co-leader November 2013 DDC
BlueEyedHopeful@hotmail.com

Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:33 pm

I completely agree with JennJenn and feel the same way

Mommy to Gavin 1-3-09 and Emma 6-3-11
PMP at 8 weeks 2-12-08

Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:43 pm

Yes I have those fears as well. DH and I were just talking last night about waiting another 6-9 months before we REALLY start trying. (Not that we haven't been already) But my cycle is way off right now.

Anyway my sister is getting married in September and I kinda don't want to be pregnant during it! Honestly it's selfish but I wanna drink champagne and wear a fancy beautiful dress! (Sigh) Just some thoughts.

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Lindsey-TTC Baby #4
Brynlee Elise (5/06)
Cody Ryan (9/09)
Paige Marie(2/12)
My Ovulation Chart http://www.youtube.com/lindseyhickman328

Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:46 pm

When we got pregnant this time around... I was like woohoo then boom OMG I gotta do morning sickness again, I gained 40 lbs last time I was pregnant great I get to be a whale during the summer months, feedings in the wee hours of the morning, potty training ahhhhh, but then I remembered all the good things... like the first time you get to hold them ( I cried), how they hold your finger while they fall asleep, how they laugh at the goofiest things & then I got my woohoo moment back

Wed Jan 23, 2013 6:05 pm

You are not alone. Everytime it is time to ttc fully I worry. Can I handly Morning sickness again(I got it very bad with first 3 kids), how will I handle if I get on bed rest again, can I really handle another child(my kids are very..ummmmm active.lol), am I ready to be changing diapers again for 4yrs(my kids train late), am I ready to get up every 2 hours, and the biggest one. Am I ready to go through labor again. Then I remember how much I love feeling the kicks,flips,hicups,and how wonderful it feels holding my child. You are not alone. Those thoughts are going through my mind right now big time.

Steph. Mother of Eva-15,Jordan-10, Christopher-9, Abigail-6,and a angel son Joshua. Host of Pregnancy and Infant Lose board. Mummieeva@yahoo.com

Wed Jan 23, 2013 10:52 pm

Jen - I forget if you have skype or G+, if so, we totally need to have some face to face time. Why don't you live closer! lol! We can talk each other down!


Well, I am glad I am not alone, but I know, since we are all here, we will be over the moon when we get our BFP's!

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com

Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:09 pm

Absolutely!

I've never been pregnant - didn't get married until I was 36, so I wonder if I will be so selfish (no Saturday morning sleeping in - WHAT?!) and scared of the changes to my body (I just lost 80lbs 2 years ago - do NOT want to gain it back!) and how it will affect my relationship with DH.

For me, the first baby really was the hardest. Not so much taking care of him, but the whole giving up the lifestyle I knew and was use to. To be perfectly honest, I don't miss my life pre kids one bit! As hard as it is was for me to adjust, eventually you develop a routine and you don't even remember to miss those Saturday mornings because you can't remember what it even feels like to sleep in! Haha! Can't miss what you don't remember, right?!

As for the weight gain/loss, if you did it before, you can do it again! I don't weigh much, but I did get stretch marks and DH and I call them my battle scars...attractive, not really, but they are proof of how amazing my body is...and if I am honest, I am still trying to lose a few of the many doughnuts I craved with my daughter.

Lastly, my DH said that his admiration and respect for me, grew times a million after seeing me give birth to our children. I admit, balance is a little hard at first, but parenting is such an amazing journey and our love has grown while watching one another interact with the kids

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com

Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:53 am

For me, the first baby really was the hardest. Not so much taking care of him, but the whole giving up the lifestyle I knew and was use to. To be perfectly honest, I don't miss my life pre kids one bit! As hard as it is was for me to adjust, eventually you develop a routine and you don't even remember to miss those Saturday mornings because you can't remember what it even feels like to sleep in! Haha! Can't miss what you don't remember, right?!

As for the weight gain/loss, if you did it before, you can do it again! I don't weigh much, but I did get stretch marks and DH and I call them my battle scars...attractive, not really, but they are proof of how amazing my body is...and if I am honest, I am still trying to lose a few of the many doughnuts I craved with my daughter.

Lastly, my DH said that his admiration and respect for me, grew times a million after seeing me give birth to our children. I admit, balance is a little hard at first, but parenting is such an amazing journey and our love has grown while watching one another interact with the kids

Wow, you have such a way with words... just reading this is so beautiful! You and your DH clearly have a very amazing relationship. Your kids are very lucky to have such a wonderful example of love! I know you will do a great job with your next pregnancy adventure and your newest LO will fit right in with your family

Thu Jan 24, 2013 10:35 am

Ellowyn wrote:

For me, the first baby really was the hardest. Not so much taking care of him, but the whole giving up the lifestyle I knew and was use to. To be perfectly honest, I don't miss my life pre kids one bit! As hard as it is was for me to adjust, eventually you develop a routine and you don't even remember to miss those Saturday mornings because you can't remember what it even feels like to sleep in! Haha! Can't miss what you don't remember, right?!

As for the weight gain/loss, if you did it before, you can do it again! I don't weigh much, but I did get stretch marks and DH and I call them my battle scars...attractive, not really, but they are proof of how amazing my body is...and if I am honest, I am still trying to lose a few of the many doughnuts I craved with my daughter.

Lastly, my DH said that his admiration and respect for me, grew times a million after seeing me give birth to our children. I admit, balance is a little hard at first, but parenting is such an amazing journey and our love has grown while watching one another interact with the kids



Wow can you say balling im already an emotional basket case but that just put the icing on the cake! Beautiful way to look at things and my Df says the same thing about my stretch marks he says they also give me character hehehe love him so much! He onced told me when we first got together I said I have scars on my belly before we even met one another and he said "its okay everyone has scars some are just more visible than others" and since that day I have never look at my scars in a bad way they are even beautiful to me maybe not others but to me I see noting but beauty!

My Ovulation Chart

Thu Jan 24, 2013 12:06 pm

Aww Glad you found my words encouraging! It really is an amazing adventure, and so worth it! Now I just need to keep reminding myself of that during my little freak out sessions! Haha!

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com

Thu Jan 24, 2013 3:28 pm

If it helps any I am having major Anxiety right now also. I want to be pregnant so bad that I worry I am making AF late with stressing. I worry because things are tight here big time. I worry because I truly wanted to just once test and suprise my husband. I do know this if we are you ladies will be the only ones finding out until I am like 6 months.lol. My husbands families reaction will not be pretty so that stresses me too.

Steph. Mother of Eva-15,Jordan-10, Christopher-9, Abigail-6,and a angel son Joshua. Host of Pregnancy and Infant Lose board. Mummieeva@yahoo.com

Thu Jan 24, 2013 3:56 pm

I don't have google + or skype...no idea how to get started, lol! And I wish we all lived closer too! (on the plus side, trying not to get my hopes to high, dh is talking about a fam trip up yours and Clara's way this year) And I also totally agree that my first was also the hardest to get adjusted to. With not having the support I did after Pey with you ladies I felt alone and had major depression. With my mil even questioning me about BF'ing and cluster feeding I felt like I was a villain keeping my baby away from everyone on purpose. She even caused dh to go against me and get ticked that I was exclusively BF'ing, until she asked a coworker about it to see if I was lying. Grrrr! If I had you ladies then I would have had more guts to stand up to her or at least make me feel not so alone.

Thu Jan 24, 2013 4:35 pm

If it helps any I am having major Anxiety right now also. I want to be pregnant so bad that I worry I am making AF late with stressing. I worry because things are tight here big time. I worry because I truly wanted to just once test and suprise my husband. I do know this if we are you ladies will be the only ones finding out until I am like 6 months.lol. My husbands families reaction will not be pretty so that stresses me too.

I understand. I hear it all the time "You have a boy and a girl! I guess your family is perfect and complete!" Well, I hate to burst their idealistic bubble, because gender has nothing to do with it! Now I know we are anxious, and sometimes question how ready we are...but bottom line...is this what YOU want? If so, and you know you want another baby, then whatever they have to say about it means absolutely nothing. Hold your head up and look them straight in the eye and say "I am thankful for the blessing of new life, aren't you?" Then just turn your ears off if they start being negative! You've got this, momma!!!

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com

Thu Jan 24, 2013 4:47 pm

I don't have google + or skype...no idea how to get started, lol! And I wish we all lived closer too! (on the plus side, trying not to get my hopes to high, dh is talking about a fam trip up yours and Clara's way this year) And I also totally agree that my first was also the hardest to get adjusted to. With not having the support I did after Pey with you ladies I felt alone and had major depression. With my mil even questioning me about BF'ing and cluster feeding I felt like I was a villain keeping my baby away from everyone on purpose. She even caused dh to go against me and get ticked that I was exclusively BF'ing, until she asked a coworker about it to see if I was lying. Grrrr! If I had you ladies then I would have had more guts to stand up to her or at least make me feel not so alone.

Well, you know where to find me! That would be awesome!

Ooooh the things I wish I had more courage to do when I had my first. I had ppd, so bad, and you know that is just not me! I am realizing that sometimes it takes me stepping up, to put everyone in my life back in their place. That sounds kind of bossy, or mean, so please know, that being catty is not my intention, but I do find, that when you allow peoples words and actions to have negative power over you, you tend to shrink and just keep shrinking until you aren't running the YOU show. At least in my experience.

It is funny, however, and I am not sure if you experienced this after #2, but some of that assertiveness just develops due to a lack of time to put up with people being ridiculous! Hahaha! I remember one time thinking, I have two kids, and absolutely no time for this conversation of how you think I should do things. It is unproductive and going nowhere...aaannnnddd ended. Ha!

Co-Leader November 2013 DDC
daisiesformama@hotmail.com